read part one here
The room had an artificial feeling temperature and an artificial smell of lemongrass. The instructor was a small,lithe man who I figured could bend himself into an 8 if needs be. A personable fellow we seemed to bond. The class started and all airs and graces dropped. He was stone cold serious about all this. I was surprised when he asked us to remove our shoes and delighted to discover i had worn a pair of cleanish socks. I gave them a quick squirt of the lemongrass when i went to take out my mat
“You’ll probably need to take two, you`re a big guy”
“For you”
My humorous reference to Christophers Nolans masterpiece The Dark Knight Rises seemed lost on this lad and i began to think about how many other pop references would float over his head,as we assumed the lotus position. I should have been thinking about my breathing because all of a sudden my head seemed to cop that my body had ran away with itself
I should have been thinking about my breathing because all of a sudden my head began to float and my knees began to ache. I thought my legs were separating from my body. Injuries flared up like an arthritic phoenix from the flames. I was in trouble. I needed to concentrate.. What was it again “in” …and then “out” or “out” and then “in”…what came after “out” again… basic aerobic function is actually quite difficult to manage when trying to conceal intense joint pain from fellow “beginners”
Speaking of my fellow beginner, they didn’t seem to have the same level of difficulties with “maintaining their core or putting their leg over the back of a chair. This was tough and getting tougher. In the most literal way possible I turned to the nearest wall for support but even that was a pure failure.
A slight loss in equilibrium whilst trying to place the ball of my foot on the inside of my knee had me reaching for anything in an attempt at corrective action.. unfotunately a loose hanging blind was the nearest option and it was not a good one.. i tumbled, they laughed, he tutted i tumbled some more he laughed
Despite the immense discomfort and acute embarrassment once the ordeal had ended I retroactively decided that it was all brilliant and as I limped home with my shoes in my hand, like a Tipperary girl after an ursline debs, I decided that I would do this again very soon but for now it was back to the couch and the coco-pops
scrumblags 